Blog toaster

Published on July 31st, 2011 | by Tommy Sunshine

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The marriage toaster of love…

I want to thank Chris Sullivan for this idea….

Getting married three times is like sticking your dick into a toaster three times thinking you won’t get burnt!

The first time, you don’t know any better, stick your dick in the marriage toaster of love and its feeling kinda good, its all warm in there, nice and cozy…  But then something starts to smell funny, wait a minute, its your dick! OWWWW!  WTF!!!

The second time sticking your member into the marriage toaster of love you’re more cautious and skeptical but you think, well maybe it wasn’t really so bad, perhaps this toaster isn’t like all the other toasters!  Maybe this toaster LOVES you!  So ya pop it on in but right away you realize what a stupid mistake you just made but shit, its too late, burned again!

So the third time around, there must be a very good reason to go sticking your dick into the marriage toaster of love.  It must be a dare or something, you’ll win money, free trip to vegas, whatever!  But you just figure, bah, I’ll just put it in real quick and pull it right back out!  Carefully you stick your dick in the toaster,  slowly push the handle down so you can make sure and just pop it out right away but oh shit, what the fuck!  ITS STUCK!  OMG Your dick is stuck in the toaster and you can’t get out, oh my god, the pain, the torture, the misery, AAAHHHH AWHHWGHGHHHH!!

Yep, right about there is where I’m at in my 3rd marriage right now… I don’t know why I’m so bitter!

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About the Author

Tommy Sunshine works full time making about $420.00 annually changing oil and filters and doing some crygenic magic for the man who tries to keep him down. He trys to be a comic, but he's very new and he sucks, really bad. Oh, and he hates marriage, he doesn't care if its gay marriage or straight marriage, its fucking stupid. I would love to get a comment!


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